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Offline Clark

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I gave my kidney to a friend
« on: January 25, 2012, 09:58:12 PM »
http://www.malehealth.co.uk/22223-i-gave-my-kidney-a-friend

I gave my kidney to a friend

Could you give up a kidney? Wallee McDonnell did: a ‘deep, moving experience that has stayed with me ever since’.

In 1998, I got a job as a chef in Skyros, the Greek island where poet Rupert Brooke is buried. I became friends with my manager Niko: a Dutchman who lived and worked on the island. I worked there for four seasons and carried on going there on holiday, meeting up with Niko when I was there.

When I visited in 2004, he was very ill but didn’t know what was wrong. Then in 2006, I got an email from Niko, telling me that he’d been diagnosed with kidney failure and would be going back to Holland for dialysis several times a week.

I came forward very quickly. I’d heard two very inspiring and moving stories about living kidney donation on the radio. They stopped me in my tracks. That someone could be so generous was very moving. And it struck me that you could actually donate your kidney to somebody outside your family. There was no reason why I couldn’t do it. I emailed Niko and offered to donate a kidney.

Chance to do something good

I must admit a lot of people advised me against it - I was in my 50s, not a young man and it could weaken me - but I never hesitated. I talked to the doctor and had the tests. I was constitutionally able to handle it. They told me I had the blood pressure of a teenager. I flew to Holland for further tests. One of these was to check I was in sound mind - they asked about my motivation.

I had an enormous admiration for Niko and his integrity. He was a good man. I felt this had come across my path and it was a chance to do something good. I had no fear until the night before the operation when I panicked a little and asked for a sleeping pill.

Niko made all the practical arrangements for my coming to Holland for the op, including accommodation afterwards, travel and so on.

Keyhole surgery

The operation itself is done by keyhole surgery. I have a minute scar. I was out in five days, Niko in a fortnight. At first he was more mobile than me but as my health improved that changed.

We didn’t speak much at first after the op which was difficult for me as I’m Irish and very chatty. Initially, he was on a huge quantity of medication which I’m sure was part of this reticence to engage in conversations at this stage. I still see him every year and our friendship has continued to grow.

I found out recently that my kidney wasn’t an ideal match for him and that has caused ongoing problems which are treated by medication. But he’s much, much better than he was. When he went back to Holland before diagnosis he could barely walk. This summer we went on a long, rambling walk in the heat of Skyros and I was struggling to keep up with him.

I can see what a difference it has made to his life. I went to the centre where he had dialysis before the operation and I couldn’t handle it. The operation makes all the difference. Yes, you need check-ups but You get your life back. We talked a lot about this this summer. I feel a better person for having done it. He thinks it has inspired him to be a better person too.

Support is impeccable

If you’re considering it, kidney donation can change a life fundamentally. People do worry about giving a part of their body but medicine is at such a high level now, it’s very safe. The support is impeccable and they won’t let you do it if you’re not fit enough. However, you do need a couple of months to recover.

I organise music concerts for a living and there is a summer break so I was able to ensure the op and my convalescence coincided with this. I’m very healthy now and still do a high-pressured job. I had a little pain where the kidney had been for a couple of months afterwards but now, four years later, nothing at all. Just a very good feeling.
Unrelated directed kidney donor in 2003, recipient and I both well.
620 time blood and platelet donor since 1976 and still giving!
Elected to the OPTN/UNOS Boards of Directors & Executive, Kidney Transplantation, and Ad Hoc Public Solicitation of Organ Donors Committees, 2005-2011
Proud grandpa!

 

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