Hi, Sarah -
First of all, I have to admit that I didn't experience any of the preoperative anxiety you are experiencing. I truly believed that I had been called by God to give my kidney to Susie, and that belief somehow managed to relieve me of all of the fears I should have felt beforehand. I shared all of the "big" positives already listed by the other posters here, but there were also a few small surprises that really touched me:
--One of the nurses on the transplant unit shared with me that "kidney donors are what keep us going." She told me that caring for living donors was her favorite part of her job because we are so happy and healthy and we remind her of the good in people. She said that we help her through the heartache of frequently losing patients (mostly those in liver failure) who die waiting for a transplant.
--Before the surgery, I never truly imagined the impact of my donation on Susie's family (duh!) After the surgery, I got the most beautiful letter from her husband, and her mother continues to send me cards and flowers and has a mass dedicated to me each year commemorating my gift.
--Susie and I have become very close friends. I barely knew her before the transplant; her 13-year-old daughter was one of my patients. It is such a thrill to see her living a full life again and knowing that I helped to make that possible!
--I also lost weight after the surgery - about 10 pounds. For the most part, I have kept it off.
--My faith in God has been strengthened immensely. I have truly lived the promise that, "The will of God will never lead you where the grace of God cannot protect you." I hope you can find some comfort in that promise, too.
I wish you all the best and pray that you find peace in the coming days before your surgery. The pain and fatigue are short-lived, but the spiritual and emotional benefits will change you forever.