Hi Lisa!
Father Pat and Sherri really said it all perfectly. I'm only here to speak about having young kids and surgery. I had a hysterectomy in August 2009, gall bladder out in Dec 2009, and donated my kidney in July 2010. I have four children, and when I had the first surgery they were 7,5,4,2. No one needed to be carried overly, but I had one in full time school (we had to drive them to school at the time), one in half day (another trip there and back), preschool, and then my youngest needed constant care, of course.
You WILL need help with the kids, absolutely, if you go this route. My husband was home for 4 days, and then returned to work, and my parents stepped in then to help. I was down for 2 weeks following both of the major surgeries. I did not carry Jordan for the full six weeks and tried not to too much until 8 weeks or so, just to be sure, because who wants to have to go back in?
So...there it is from that vantage point, and I'm just one person. It's doable- but only if you have help. Any middle of the night stuff-you can't go running in and scoop the baby up from the crib, moving will be sore for a bit....you will be "off duty" for awhile. Your healing will need to come first because those kiddos are going to continue to need you, as will any future kids you have. You get one chance to heal well the first time around (for what we can control, anyway).
Maybe at the transplant clinic they would allow you to speak with one of the social workers sooner rather than later? They are all about donors and the issues that are present. It is unfortunate that all clinics are not the same, I am hoping that your dad's is one of the really good ones, as was the one I was at. The donor advocates were outstanding, and although it was a little different (alot different, actually) for me as a non directed donor (those emotional ties and connections make a humungous difference), you should be completely supported no matter what you decide. You will be here, for sure!
Good luck, and lots of love.
Nicki