3 weeks post-op with questions

[logansaunt]

3 weeks and 2 days post op with concerns.

1.  Surgery on a Monday, came home on a Friday, took Percocets for almost 2 wks for pain. Tylenol does nothing for me.  Was constipated for several days but once I stopped the pain pills, everything seemed fine, but I'm now battling diarrhea that has lasted 5 days. I called the transplant center support line and was told (after verifying I'm not running a fever) to drink Gatorade and take some Imodium. 

2.  I experienced horrible nightmares the first week home and even though it's gotten a little better, I still have bad dreams. In each of these dreams, I'm being harmed in some way or someone is after me to hurt me or my family. 

3.  I've never had any issues of depression or anxiety in my lifetime but I catch myself just bursting into tears for no reason.  I can't explain it.  My recipient is doing great, I've got a great support system at home, my friends and family have been with me throughout the whole process, why am I so sad and emotional??  Is it from the extreme fatigue and exhaustion from not sleeping well??

4. I just want to feel "normal" again. 

5.  Am I losing my mind??

I honestly felt better last week than I do this week. Trust me, I'm not over-doing it. I've got an office job and I have gone in to work a few hours each day for the last week but it's not been strenuous at all. I check in on things and then I come home. 


Suggestions??

[Fr Pat]

Dear "Logansaunt",
     I'm sorry to hear of your difficulties. I'm not a medical professional, and don't have much to offer on many of your difficulties, but here are some thoughts that might be of help:
--- 3 weeks and 2 days is not a lot of time for recovery/readjustment after such a serious surgery, especially if you were on Percocet for two weeks. After stopping pain meds (and the original anesthesia) it can take a while for all that to really flush out of the system. I know that "be patient" may sound like dumb advice, but do please keep in mind that your body and mind have been through a LOT, a recovery may be gradual.
--- Some donors have recorded finding themselves more easily moved to tears and strong emotions after donation surgery. Not necessarily tears of sadness, but perhaps tears when words are not sufficient. Depression can indeed be a problem for some after donation surgery (or after ANY surgery), but you might ask yourself if the tears are sadness, or are they deep emotion?
--- Having sleep difficulties, plus the digestive disruption of constipation followed by diarrhea, can really throw off anybody's balance. Please be very careful to maintain a good intake of nutrients daily. If food is not appealing, perhaps add cans of "Ensure" or other safe nutrition supplements until eating and elimination are back to normal.
--- You might try adding some naps if your night-time sleep is not good.

       I hope that some others here can also offer some help. Please do keep us informed of how things are going.
                     Fr. Pat

[sherri]

Logan's aunt,

I'm glad to hear you made it to the other side so first of all "Welcome to the Club"! Quite shocking isn't it? This is something you have probably been thinking about non stop, planning, testing, worrying, asking questions about for several months if not longer. Well now that it has come to fruition, sounds like your emotional side is trying to catch up. Donors are sometimes so focused during the testing process about the surgery, the risks, the pain, their recipient etc they tend not to focus on themselves or really think about the meaning and actual nitty gritty of what they are doing. Maybe there is some sadness, and feelings of loss after a surgery where a part of you was removed. This part was not just removed but actually given to someone else. A part of you lives in someone else! Maybe the dangers or risks that you tried to push out of your mind are just starting to appear real to you and you finally are thinking, wow I just had surgery and something could have happened to me. I felt very emotional for years after my donation. I couldn't really talk about it and all that led up to the surgery often without tears. It was an emotional and stressful period in my life. It took several years of talking to professionals about my experience to help me through. Don't go it alone. After you are feeling better physically, search out support from a good social worker or psychologist to help you through this. You may want to try the independent donor advocate to see if he/she is able to help you find the support you need or go through your own insurance. I ended up using my own insurance to provide mental health services. I did use Jewish Family Services since it was more affordable than going to a private practitioner.

Keep posting here. You may also want to keep a journal to help sort out your feelings. I hope you feel better soon. In terms of the bowel issue, if you do not see improvement make sure to call the transplant center and push to be seen by a physician. Infections from a hospital environment are not uncommon.

You gave a wonderful gift to your family. Try to be kind to yourself and get the support you need. Would love to hear how things are progressing for you so I hope you keep us posted.

All the best,

Sherri

[Nancy]

I'm four weeks post op and thankful being a little more emotional than before donation is my only symptom.  It takes a lot less to make me tear up than it did before.  I can't read a sad story, particularly about animal abuse, without crying.  I was walking laps with my sister the other night and she suggested maybe when they took out the kidney they put in a heart.

[elephant]

Dear Logansaunt,

I found the anesthesia made me wonky for a couple of weeks, but it passed eventually.  Every now and then I get a "hospital flashback" and it's been two years.

If you don't start feeling better soon get some medical advice - you may have picked something up.  Let us know how you are doing soon.

Love, elephant

[Mizchelle]

Its okay to "feel" ... its a true sign of one who has great Compassion. 

[logansaunt]

Well, it was 5 weeks yesterday since the surgery and I am happy to report that I feel much, much better.  What a difference 2 weeks make! 

I'm able to rest much better, I'm totally off of Percocet and my digestive system has returned to normal.  Also gone are the crying episodes.  I have to agree with one poster, I feel like my body was just totally exhausted and that really affected my mood.

Thank you SO much to everyone that took the time to post and offer me encouragement.  You have no idea how much your kind words and comments helped me get through those darkest days.  Whenever I was down, I would go back and re-read every word.  You guys are the best!