First of all, I want to thank everyone here for their advice and encouragement. I have spent a lot of time on this site in the last six months, preparing for this process.
It was a very moving experience, and I now share an unbelievable bond with my brother. Five days after surgery, his creatinine has dropped from 4.7 to 1.2. This was a preemptive transplant. He was never on dialysis, although he was borderline needing it. There is an energy and sharpness in his voice that had slowly faded over the past years. He now sounds full of life and this truly is a new beginning for him.
When I first contemplated this surgery, I was filled with fear and read everything I could get my hands on. I went into it well aware of risks and potential complications, but was able to do it because it was for my brother. When the time came, I was surprised with a feeling of serenity and calm and smiled and waved to him as I was wheeled past to my operating room. It surprised me to see him crying as he waved. The next time we saw each other was in the post anesthesia care unit... we were far away from each other, but they cleared a path so we could make eye contact and wave, and at one point pushed our beds together for some smiling and hand holding.
Neither one of us has needed much pain medication. Mostly tylenol since discharge for me, which was about 24 hours post op.
A couple of practical thoughts for those with this still in the future:
THE PREP! I've heard people ecstatic about being told there was minimal bowel prep. Mine started 2 weeks prior to surgery when I was told to stop drinking any thing with bubbles: no soda, beer or champagne. Three days prior to surgery, I was on a clear liquid diet. The afternoon before surgery, I had 2 bottles of mag citrate, about 2 hours apart, then back on clear liquids until midnight. That was it. The morning after surgery I was up in a chair eating pancakes with syrup. Never had any nausea or vomiting or even any of the bloating that I've read about. I think this prep really helped.
THE HEADPHONES: My brother was stuck in the ICU a bit longer than he should have been because of a bed shortage and the noise was keeping him up. I gave him my Bose noise reduction headphones to dial down the atmosphere and he was very grateful and was able to actually get some real sleep post op.
I am about 50 miles away from him, so I have not seen him in a few days, but we are looking forward to a very merry Christmas Eve!