My kidney recipient brother just passed, from Covid

[Elizabeth]

I am feeling very empty and alone.  Other siblings/friends can’t understand the depth of my loss.  Feeling like I lost him along with a part of me, literally.  Am hoping donors who have also lost their loved one will offer some help for my grief journey.
It would have been 13 years since donation, January 2010.

[Clark]

Best wishes, Elizabeth. There is as yet no easy, recognizable name for the post donation relationship between donor and recipient. Even so, most recognize there is one, of unique, deep meaning, even for those who make non-directed donations and never learn the identity of their recipients. I'm sorry your grieving isn't being acknowledged by those you expect support from. Do please take good care, and know that we understand that there is grief at this loss, and it can be very deeply felt.


If you're of a mind to reach out to peer donors with experiences you can review and choose from among for one on one conversation, please take a look at our Donor Buddy volunteers. https://livingdonorsonline.org/living-donor-buddies/living-donor-buddies-user-agreement/. I hope this helps.

[Elizabeth]

Thank u for your reply, Clark.  January 13, would have been our 13th anniversary, he passed on December 13th, one month shy of our 13th anniversary.  I have been looking on the donor buddies site, I had a couple terrific buddies before and after surgery.  I am not seeing anyone, so far, who mentions the loss of their recipient.  I am struggling.  The loss is so very deep, it’s very hard to explain to anyone even in my family, so I keep it to myself.  I am thankful that you are there!  And appreciate any input. 

[Clark]

I hope you're coping well, Elizabeth. I hope it's all right with you that I've added your anniversary to our calendar. If any of the details are incorrect or worded in a way you'd prefer to change, or if you'd rather I take it down entirely, please let me know. Best wishes.