I also found the donation experience to be quite overwhelming and needed more support than the transplant center could give me. I decided to contact Jewish Community Services in my area (I live in Baltimore) where they offer mental health services. I used my own insurance to do this and it was the most affordable. A private therapist could be very costly so it is good advice to go through your insurance. It may take going to a few different people to see who you find my helpful and with whom you connect.
When I called for intake I described what I was looking for and it turned out I saw a social worker who had some experience in transplant. At the time, I also thought I needed someone who was familiar with transplant but hindsight it wasn't the most important. After the transplant I ended up seeing another social worker who did not have experience in transplant but was still helpful. For me, a lot of the issues I faced were more related to family dynamics and it was the "kidney" that happened to bring them to the forefront.
Seeking professional help was probably the best gift I gave myself. I had a safe place to vent, someone to listen who didn't keep telling me how "easy" kidney donation was and how I only needed one kidney.Unrelated donors often comment that people think they are crazy for donating to a stranger. As a related donor, I found that people almost expected it of me. I often got the response, "oh but you're related so it's easier".
It has been almost 7 years since my donation and I am in a much better place. Related kidney donation brings a whole host of issues. Most often it isn't about the kidney or the surgery but more about the raw emotions and the baggage we bring to the table.
Long story short, since becoming a living kidney donor, I switched professions (I was in health care before) but I am now a registered nurse and work as a transplant coordinator for stem cell transplant. I had an interesting set of patients before me yesterday, two sisters and the donor looked extremely worried about the stem cell donation. Now stem cell donation is not as involved as a solid organ, but again it was not about the donation itself but about all the emotions that something like this brings out. The recipient said the process of the donation is not that big of a deal, it is like donating blood, which is true, but what I pointed out is the amount of responsibility and the burden that is often carried by the donor. Transplant is a very emotionally charged experience for some. and I think in particular, for siblings.
A wonderful plan for you to have someone in place to help you through.
Would love to hear more from you if you would like to share. This forum was extremely helpful for me. All the best to you and your family.
Sherri